What The Fuck Kanye

I have alway had a soft spot for Kanye. After all I figure all that genius must come at a price so I stepped over and around a lot of his ramblings and just told myself (For the Music.) Fast forward to May 2018 and I'm standing around with my mouth open in disbelief. Did he say that? No really. did he really just say that?

Let's go back. He was snatched up after a concert because they said his crazy went to far and he was thrown into a facility while his wife had just stepped away. I'm just saying interesting timing. Then he's quiet for about a year and  THEN he  jumps out with his Trump love and Hat. I'm annoyed but I am telling myself thet there is more to this story. He is probably giving us the Rope Ah Dope. Then he's gonna come out with what he really wants to say, so i'm waiting. Then we hear rumblings of a Charlemgne interview and from what Charlarmagne is saying I figure, ok we good. All will be revealed and our boy is back.

By the time the interview was released I decided to wait till the home was quiet so I stayed up till almost 2am listening intently as he explained and exposed bit of himself we had never see before. I was releaved. Then in what felt like less than 24 hours later TMZ! He has shaved his head, he is looking and sounding manic and THEN that Shit comes out his mouth. Slavery Was A Choice...... I mean there was more to it. There was more to the interview. But in my heart I knew that was all people were going to hear. I could sort of understand or should I say I was fighting past that sentence to understand what he was trying to say in its entirety but the tweets he released explaining himself seem to be the final nail in his couffin and all I could think is. "Boy you need to either come off your medication or up the dose by a lot more" because this shit right here....... You Are Broken. You Are Lost.

It's a sad day for music lovers and Kanye supporters. I really hope he stops talking, starts reading and researching his history and Visiting memorials. It's time for him to stop speaking. If this was a ploy to sell his music, it would be best if he just gave it away as way of a small apology. He has really hurt his community and just saying sorry and I love you is just not enough anymore.

DJANGO

DJANGO! Well; what a movie. Where do I start! So many questions I would like to ask the cast.

I could say that Quentin was not as gruesome as he usually is or that some of the scenes were not over the top blood splattered but the truth is I am on the fence about these statements because I was still cringing, holding my breath, dropping my jaw and I even found myself looking away in one of the scenes. That said it's an amazing movie and we should all have a look see.

In true Quentin style he gives us the heads up that we are in for a bumpy ride with the opening scene assault of welted back dirty shackled slaves. The kind of dirty that you can almost smell and the sound of dragging chains. I don't know about you guys but that visual still gets me in the gut and I truly have a hard time believing that we were treated that way not too long ago. Anyway; as soon as you have tempered your nerves, like a whip you are assaulted again. This time by the N WORD. It comes ringing  out of a white mans mouth with the comfort and ease of that time and then even worse is repeated by Django in that accepting matter of fact ease.

Kudos to Quentin for digging in there right away but what was running through my mind was how did Jamie and all those other black actors feel sitting in the moment on that film. I doubt any white reporter would throw that out on the red carpet but I will certainly be trolling the internet for a sit down interviews to see if its broached.

As I got further into the movie I saw the speed at which Django absorbed information and the way in which he accepted and sat in his freedom. Almost like he was never a slave. His confidence was so current and I questioned his acceleration as in was it too quick? Was the passing of time to subtle and so I  missed his progression and then I satisfied myself with the fact that back then your very survival probably hinged on being a quick learner.

The movie stirred up so may emotions that it has been difficult to just come out with a straight review. Instead I was filled with questions. Questions about the treatment of the film and the time and wanting to hear from the actors. I loved Christoph swagger and I hated Leonardo so much. He sat so comfortably in that roll that I had to keep saying to myself, It's only a movie, he's a humanitarian, and finally, he's just that good of an actor. Samuel opened the doors a crack as to what a head house slave function was. Adding yet another layer and while this is no full on assault like Roots I would not count it out for content. It manages to give us a quick be it brutal taste of the time.

What can I say. Thank you for the ride Quentin. Thank you for the ride.

FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL

So it's that time again and school has started and my home is as quiet as a grave yard. How often we complain about all the noise and nagging but as I settle in for the day I realize that the little one is off again pursuing his own life enjoying friends and education and mom suddenly has a moment to think about how quickly he has grown and where did the time go.
This Christmas was not one of the best as I was ill but we still managed to make it christmas and have some stay at home fun over the holidays. I got him a Wii so my house was alive with the shouting and laughter as the boys competed from am to pm trying to get the best of each other but remembering that the baby must win or there will be crying an pouting and daddy didn't play fair; so maybe not competing too hard but having loads of fun.
Yep, it's the first day of school and my home is quiet for a moment but never fear it will be 3pm soon enough and then there will be something else completely to shout about.

I Love The Way He Loves Me

The question that always made me go a bit funny was and still is. What do you love the most about your husband? I knew the answer. The same answer always popped into my head but I always responded with my second and third. His smile and his good heart. Somehow the first thing that always pooped into my head made me feel selfish. I've never said it out loud till today because I think I now understand. It's the way that he loves me. What I loved about him was the way he loved me. It was pure and I felt it.

Now let me explain myself. I have been told countless times by ex boyfriends that they loved me but now that I've felt real love I can say that theirs just feel words. I am sure that they thought they loved me or maybe they loved me the best they could but i never felt it. I just accepted the words as true.

Flo loves me freely, with no embarrassment and no conditions. He loves me with respect, care, generosity and kindness. All these things but what I loved the most was the fact that I felt it. I felt loved. You see I didn't come from an affectionate family. In fact I don't think I have ever heard my parents say the words I love you to me. Now I am not saying that my parents didn't love me because they do and I know this but at the time, between the discipline and life I did not quite recognize it. It was something that always bothered me so I always tell my children how much I love them and i hug and kiss them and you know what? I think my folks may have picked it up because I see them doing it with my kids.

MADAGASCAR 3D

So I went to see Madagascar 3 in 3D yesterday with the little one. I am not ashamed to say that I was probably more excited than he was because ever since my daughter took me to see Madagascar 2 on the big screen I have been addicted. I had not laughed that hard at a movie in a long time and Thankfully I was in Trinidad where laughter is a norm. I have been living in London for some time now and have somehow trained myself  to contain my joy but thats another story.

I was told that the movie was funny but that doesn't even scratch the surface. That's like referring to the Mona Lisa as JUST a picture. NOBODY bothered to talk about the 3D effects and THAT is what excited me more than anything. Oh My God! It was amazing! I have seen 3D movies before and they were good but THIS! This movie from start to finish was amazing. A feast for the eyes. Everything was jumping off screen. As I looked around I could see the kids grabbing and ducking and fanning things away and I could feel the urge to do the same. The animation was spectacular the colours bold, the circus breathtakingly beautiful and it draws you in, kids and grown-ups alike. I don't want to give anything away for those who have not seen it and for those that saw the regular move I would strongly recommend that you go back. Pay a few more bob and see it in 3D.

I WANT TO KICK HIS ASS!!!

Why is it that men always think that if they put a ring on it and or you have their baby that they are now free to be the true ass hole they always intended to be. They think that because you are soooo busy raising their baby that all your senses have died along with your instincts or should I say the ones that connect them to you. They somehow think that it is all attached to the baby so it now gives them a free pass to act the fool and put them in line for a proper ass kicking or a near death experience courtesy you.

Don't they realize that we were born to multitask and that eventually they WILL get caught out in their stupidity. How come they didn't learn that in their little man manual alongside the bit where they are pretending to hear you or nodding an act interested.

I am so fed up to the back teeth with this nonsense. How did our mothers do it. How did they just get on with the process of raising a family with a man essentially under foot. I say under foot because he is there, and he may be bring in some money but if he's not helping around the house or helping with the day to day routine of the child then what is his fockin purpose. OH I know they think they helping when after a LONG day running after a baby (alone) and you finally get that child to bed and you think you now have an hour or two to yourself before it all starts all over again, here he comes now looking all sheepish and thinks he all cute, trying to rub on you when all you want is to be able to eat something uninterrupted and have a bath and breathe.

Sex has now turned into a chore, as looked forward to as washing dishes or cleaning the toilet. I know this sounds really bad but its true. I use to really enjoy sex but now who has the energy. Its now under the just because label. I know for a fact that I ain't the only woman feeling this way because I spoke to couple others and its all the same. Maybe if he helped to cut the work in half I might find the energy to look sheepish too but right now it to hell with the sheep.

Mom's always on about choosing your battles but the choices are getting slimmer and slimmer with the little one always there to pick up the tensions so what do you do? You shut your mouth for the child's sake an move along when what you really want to do is curse his ass out or hit him with a flippin POT but I digress.

I was talking about the emerging asshole. The lies they tell to avoid everything I just mentioned. The lies they tell about a friend in need of a shoulder because he's going threw a bad patch or saying they are working late when they are really just staying back to drink with friends and come home late smelling of smoke form the cigarettes that he says he's not smoking to then wake you form a sound tired sleep because guess what? Its toilet time. WDH! I still have to wake up early with the baby while he sleeps in from a hangover but don't worry, me and the baby will be banging every pot and door and playing with the noisiest toys till IT emerges. YES. I have been reduced to being passive aggressive. What I really wanted to do is fill a bucket of water and throw it over him. in. Breathe. It can't be done because then MY bed would be wet and I would have to find a way to dry it while he flounces off for a sulk. Why did I get Married.

My Honest Take on The Kim Kardashian Debacle

I have been resisting this notion about myself for the longest time but I think it's time I come out of the closet and just admit it.

I Am. *Sigh, A KARDASHIAN Fan. There I said it.

I am not the kind of fan that loves everything that they say and do because I don't but they certainly have my attention. I am wrapped up in their lives and I am always curious as to what they are up to and what they are going to say or do next.

I am in love with Khloe an Lamar. Their love is addictive to watch and it somehow gives the rest of us out there hope that we too can find love like that. Which leads me smoothly into the reason I am writing this. The Kim debacle.

Like everyone else out there I to have an opinion on the fall out. See I saw that coming. Not so soon but coming all the same. NO! I do not think it was fake or that it was a money thing but I do think that Kim got carried away, competitive, silly green eyed. Human.

Let me explain. Kim has said how many times that she missed having someone. That she wanted to be married and have babies by 30. She has been watching hers sisters have what she wants for some time now and wondering when will it be her turn. Instead of being grateful for what she has she somehow got it into her head that she is the lead Kardashian so she should be more than capable of getting herself a man, any man and some babies.

When Khloe was getting married she kept saying "It should be me, It should be me" she might have been trying to play it off like it was just a joke but she wasn't. I am not saying she wished her sister ill will but she was jel jel. Said It. She was talking smack about him being way too tall. So how did Kris get a look in? And not her type. I was like, huh? She ain't choose no man for you honey, she chose her man for herself and dont get me started on the Kourtney Mason issue. She has had baby on the brain since Kourt popped that little boy out. She has seen how Kourt has managed to keep her life going without having to go the barefoot an pregnant route so she sees how and that it works and is ready to have a go. Who could blame her really but she has to understand that you can't manufacture what the other girls have. She has to be patient, she has to be selective. You cant just spin around in a circle of men and point and say "Him, he will do" and take off running. Thats crazy. I think thats what she did and on realizing that she had made a mistake, a very expensive mistake decided to cut her loses before it got even more expensive and is picking up alot of flack for it. Honestly, I don't think that dude was right for her anyway.

You see as fabulous as Kim's life is. As successful as she is. As beautiful as she is. She still craves more and while that's not a bad thing. Its coming across like her inner voice is saying. I am the one that brought the fame. I am the lead K so how come they have it all when in truth and fact it is where it need to be right now. She may not want to feel this way but it seeps out of her. See that's what happens when you have your life recorded and you show it for all to see. We SEE!

I ain't mad at you girl. You made a mistake. One day your prince will come and I hope when he does you have the strength to stick by him because marriage and babies ain't easy. I know. It puts you to the test so make sure you have a nice solid foundation before you go galloping into the sunset with some dude. You ain't Elizabeth Taylor. God rest her soul, nor do you want to be so chill. He comin.......

Nursery Woes

I am sitting here with a heavy heart this morning. My little one has just started nursery and the first 2 weeks he seemed to be having a wonderful time then the last two day descended into despair.

He was doing fine but ended up with a terrible flue because; and I fully blame the teachers. He was doing what they call water play and got his pants and socks went and they didn't change him all day even though I told them that he had a full change of clothes in his bag. He ended up with 2 days of raging fever. 39.7c. He is still couching and is full of mucus and this is almost 2 weeks later. He has never been ill for more that 3 days so you can understand my worry and feeling furious.

I know that I have to learn how to let go and trust but this is certainly not helping my cause.

Father And Daughter Gone Wrong

I was surfing the telly when I came across Super Nanny and stopped. After all we can all do with some tips on child rearing from time to time. They were dealing with this couple that had 4 kids. 1 girl and 3 boys. The father was patient and loving and super over protective of the boys but when it came to his 13 year old daughter he was impatient, angry and down right hostile. I felt sad and confused for her and as I got further into it I could not see a reason for him to be acting this way.

She was the typical teen with the usual lack of interest in chores and homework etc and as usual they tell a few lies as we all do to cover. Yes, she stopped calling him dad and now called him Joe and was sometimes rude to him but it certainly looked like a defense mechanism. What her father got from this was that she was she was mean, lazy, untrustworthy and in his own words "a pathological liar" and therefore not worthy of his time so he cut her off. He stopped speaking to her. No hellos when he came home from work. No how was your day. The only words he had for her was laced with whips, digs and hard dry sarcasm.

I watched on in horror wondering if perhaps the child was not his but she was and Super Nanny was on him trying to get him to make that change but he fought her at every turn with excuse after excuse about needing time to make a change. His biggest resistance unfolding with his 13 year old daughter standing right in front of him, guard down asking him to acknowledge her and love her like the rest of her siblings. His response was to mock her. It would have been like receiving a kick to the gut. (I wept)

I don't know if men understand that they are the FIRST man in their daughters life and that he is the example and her reference point when it comes to choosing a partner later on. He is the blue print so the way he treats her AND her mother is what is in her mental library.

I cringed watching this thing unfold before my eyes because I knew that her choices later on were going to be bad and it would probably be a long road to her choosing a man that would treat her right if HE her father chose not to correct his behavior. So many times we look around us wondering "Why does she allow herself to be treated this way." This is why.

You cant bully or shout your child into what or who you want them to be. Instead listen. You might get a better picture of who they are now and a peak into who they are going to be.

The Night Routine From Hell

It seems like the older you get the longer your bedtime routine becomes I've discovered. With the brushing of the teeth, flossing, picking and the mouthwash but guess what? You have only just begun because now you have the face to do.

Cleanse, tone and NIGHT moisturizer. Yes folks, it is now 1 cream for the day and another by night. God forbid a wrinkle or puffiness turns up to ruin your day.

Foot cream. My daughter has informed me that the after every bath and nightly application of foot cream fights off the oncoming crusty heels and keep athlete's foot at bay so it has now been added to the routine in a bid to miraculously sprout sexy feet and last but not least.

The creaming of the hands, elbows and knees. We all hate achey bits.

By the time I'm done with all this I am indeed ready for bed because my ass has just knocked out my reserve and I am truly tired.

I could say that we are all doing this for the men in our lives and blame them for yet another inconvenience so we could remain mildly interesting to them but I would be lying. It is all vanity and I for one will not be going down without a fight.

Good Night!

Quick Trim Diet

(Still have to add the diet and the exercise and a better account of what happened.)

Day 1. Took my tablets and feeling very nervy but i guess i have to wait for the body to adjust.

Day 2. Well i am having lots of BM (bowel movement) I don know how people go to work and go threw this. I am going alot but it is a cleanse so I am riding with it.

Day 3. Still having alot of BM but it is slowing down a bit. Don't have to run to the toilet. Lets just say I have the hang of it and can walk. Lost 5lbs

Day 4. Could not jog this morning if my life depended on it. My walk was more of a quick tight light glide step. Thank God for the cushioning in my shape ups. I just moved really fast an clinched my butt an tummy an hoped for the best. My tummy was like WDF did u put that greasy pizza in there for? Didn't we just clean that out? On the up side. After my abs, another BM and a shower the tummy settled down an my panic was over.

Day 8. Bloated and tired but went for my power walk as usual. Getting fed up of the BM and feeling hungry but just a few days to go.

Day 9. Took my tables and but now a new thing. I am feeling nauseous. Went for my walk anyway but it was really bad. I couldn't focus and had to stop a few time. Thats it. I draw the the line at nauseous. I will continue with the diet and water but i m done with the pills. At least for now. Lost 2 lbs so 7 lbs gone in all.

I think I will have a go again in 2 weeks but only for 3 or 4 days.

Day 10. Woke up for my walk at 8 am as usual and guess what? No rush to the toilet for BM. I can literally wake have a wee and a cup of tea then get dressed and hit the park. I am a happy bunny.

Shape Ups Sneaks

I had been checking out the Sketchers Shape Ups on line for a bit wondering if they really worked and then quite by coincidence I found another version for half the price at Sports Direct. Its the TS Sports version and the technology is the same so I decided to buy them and give them a try and they are amazing.

First I used them for the usuial family walk about and they were very comfortable and I felt a few corrections here and there to my posture but not till I took them for the propper test run did I get the propper feed back I was looking for.

I put them on for my power walk and right away I could feel the difference. These sneaks really do correct your walk and sort of set the pace. At first I had to slow down and really allow the shoes to correct my balance and gait I wasn't expecting this. I got really excited and decided to pay attention and see what these bad boys could really do.

I could feel it engaging my core muscle, the calves were next then the the back straightened out. Thighs, butt and inner thighs were all getting involved. The other big surprise was that all these muscles woke up in half the time it usually took and I was keenly aware of this.

I will be using them from now on of course and will give you an update at the end of the week because there was a bit of tweak in the lower back but I want to make sure its it a good working pain and not something else.

Recommendations : Remember to lace up properly because it really throws off your walk and balance.

Wear a proper pair of socks so you don't feel the fabric rubbing into your feet.

Not really for running and they say so but gave it a go none the less an it gives great bounce and recover but maybe the height might cause you to twist the ankle.

Go with the walk and remember to change up the pace.

My Weight Journey

I don't know if I told u guys this but I put on 28lbs after my operation. They tell you not to lift or stretch etc for 8 weeks but by that time we were into winter and getting my butt outside for a walk was not going to happen an who da hell works out in winter. So the lbs piled on and now I have been scrambling for the past month trying to remove the weight.
Problem is.... Its not shifting. I lost 4lbs in the first 2 weeks but 2 weeks later they were back with a friend. 1lb. I put on 5lbs and my ass has been working out 1hr an a half a day 5 days a week for a month. Madness!

I have come to a decision. I need a plan B,C+D. Desperate times call for desperate measures and I am taking you along with me.
I bought the Shape Ups sneeks (plan B) the Quick Trim is in the post (plan C) and my husband is on the hunt for the Cho Yung Tea (plan D)
I am not usuially this manic about my weight but the baby is 2 years plus now and frankly I am fed up of those maternity camouflage tops I drag out to hide the bump. Stepping onto the scale is another carry on as I brace myself to get disappointed and or depressed.

I don't want a crazy diet or to be stuck on diet pills or even to HAVE to work out 5 days a week. I just want the weight gone and I can take it from there.

From what I can tell my problem seems to be my metabolism. It has fallen into a deep sleep, a coma if u like and I NEED it to wake up hence the Quick Trim 14 day Burn and Cleanse. It is suppose to jump start your metabolism. I figure if Kim and Khloe already tried and tested it and it worked for them an lots of others I would give it a bash. They have been talking about it for ages. Long before the got the contract and Khloe is really smoking.

Finally the Cho Yung Tea. This tea has been used by the people of China and Asia for hundreds of years to stay in shape and it's completely natural with no side effects so at the very worst I will just be having 2cups of tea a day and I do that already.

I have been searching the internet for weeks now reading up on these 3 products so wish me luck on this journey.

Shame In Meh Eye

Well we just come back from play group and d boy put down a three course performance to end all performances.

Time to go and d boy bawl down d place like he on fire. Poor me trying to hold on d boy but he drop to d floor and start to roll around like a croc on crack. Shame in meh eye. D boy show dem all he colours, even d ones i eh c yet.

Again I have to say it. In Trini 2 hot slap and all dat would have come to a halt before he even hit d mat but in jolly old England we have to reason with them so he take full advantage an now that we home he have d nerve to b grinnin and skinnin like nothing happen.

THE MOVIE NINE

Watched the movie NINE last night and right off the top I would call it a celebration of woman.

Our sensuality, our capacity to love unconditionally, our forgiving nature and knowledge of self. All our strengths and weaknesses  beautifully portrayed in titillating imagery. You could almost taste the cameras intentions.

I would definitely watch it again.

Thats Wat U Get

Beware of french men and their extra sensitive shit. Every freekin word is measured with them it seems  and even after 8 years he's still pretends not to get it and it is getting right up my nose which brings me to my point.

When I use the work freekin I am just letting off a small bit of frustration like releasing the valve to let out a small bit of steam in appose to holding back and finally blowing up and having a full blown cuss out as we say on d island. So freek= steam F*@k mudda a**= cuss out.

Maybe he has not seen the other one is so long that he has forgotten but keep scratching at my tree and he will get the reminder he is looking for.

Peace&Love

(Ommmm)

The Ear Factor

My Idiot husband woke me a whole half an hour early thereby solidifying the already know fact that men only ever listen to the first half of what we say if any.

The cry of women everywhere again rings out. "He never listnes to me." We are yet again proven right but at what cost.I'll tell you shall I. My freakin half an hour sleep.
GOOD MORNING!

The X Factor Xed

I have to say,I am really not feeling The X Factor this year. For some reason it just feels to staged and a bit lame. I miss the rawness of the auditions and now it is all about the Judges and them wanting to win not the acts. And what is this new shit about having the last 2 have a sing off only to throw it back to the votes. It just seems all cowardly on the judges part. Its like they have made some kind of pact with eachother. Shame on you Simon. I just might decide to give the rest a miss.

X Factor Begins (phone blog)

So I'm watching my X Factor and waiting for Simons first good zinger when straight out of left field Cheryl and Danny draws first blood and Candy Rain is the victim of their hit and run. True enough their vocal was so so but the judges wernt talking about that. It was all about the groups dress code when they of all people know that sex sells. I say go for the UKs Pussy Cat Dolls. Why ignore what you use to do. Embrace it and ride it like a race horse heading for toco.
PS: I liked Joe and funny poodle Stacy.

PHONE BLOG

Well praise be I am finally back on my account. I have been locked out for weeks and had not the time to get on the lap top to fix this. I had no plans for doing my blog from my phone but it looks like this is going to be the way for the next month at least so I figured I best give it a bash and see how it feels.